It’s the most wonderful time of the year. Right? Perhaps for some, certainly not for all. I’m sitting firmly on the fence with one leg on either side. I’m certainly looking forward to seeing my children soaking it all in and I’m sure come Christmas morning I’ll be all flowing with spirit. Until then though, I am more humbug. Until the moment of giving, I am humbug because it’s expensive.

The logical part of my brain just can’t give in to the free spirit of a holiday I don’t actually celebrate. I participate in the holiday, but we certainly don’t celebrate it. There is no church in my plans for this coming weekend, nor any real mention of the holiday’s origin. I don’t know if I am a true Christian, I guess so. I’m not Jewish or Muslim, or anything else. I also believe in God. I believe in heaven. Not so sure about hell and I also don’t buy the entire story about Jesus or the entire Bible. Especially not enough to forge an entire belief system around. Just too many holes for my scientific logical mind. I don’t subscribe to any church because I always find something in their rules I disagree with. I also have a hard time supporting an institution that runs itself like a business but refuses to consider itself one. I am very spiritual, but not religious. I was once part of a religion. Roman Catholic. In my family’s time of need though, they turned their backs on us. I’ll never forget the moment I looked at the church as liars and nothing but a corporation. We had recently returned from a trip to the grocery store where my parents used food stamps to help pay the bill. At home we had a letter from our church that we were not donating enough every week to be considered good standing members of said church. Imagine that. We left that church and found another that felt more like home but when we moved out of state, we left that church behind as there was no suitable replacement. Since then I have looked to find a potential replacement, but those rules keep getting in my way.

We will do the whole Santa thing and gift exchange as per usual because it’s fun and the kids will love it. I enjoy getting gifts just as much as the next guy and I really enjoy giving them. Logically though, I don’t know why we have to pick this one particular day to do it. Why not bestow gifts on loved ones all year? Why not do it on Thanksgiving? Isn’t that when we’re supposed to be giving thanks to everything in our lives? I guess I could look it up on the Internet but I’m sure I’d find as many explanations as there are religions. I have nothing against holidays, perhaps just at all the commercial exploitation of them. I don’t know, I’m just a bit lost I guess. Maybe the Polar Express will come pick me up on Thursday night and all will be explained.

On Friday, it will be a holiday many in my family love with all their heart. We will celebrate all the wonderful things in our lives and all the love we have for each other. We will sit as a family and consume a glorious meal. We will have plenty of smiles as we witness the pure joy of Santa at work with my little girls and we will help them play with their new things. That’s the spirit of the holiday right? To enjoy the company of loved ones and celebrate that love? I guess it depends on who you ask. There will be lots of Christmas themed music on the speakers as if you have a choice. I don’t know of any other holiday at this time with such a vast amount of options. We do need some new music though, something modern in terms of lyrics. Not too many sleighs roaming around anymore. If you get a new iPod or iPhone, you can have some fun with the music by using iCaroler[iTunes Link]. It’s only $1 and it allows you to play around with Christmas carols. If you have friends with the app, you can all play it together and it syncs with each device creating your own little caroling crew. It’s a fun little app to mess around with this holiday season.

As quickly as it all came upon us, it will be over and then it will just be Saturday. For us, that means it’s time to put together a birthday celebration for my youngest daughter. She will turn 4 just a few days later. More about that in a few days.

Until then though, I hope you and your family have a happy and safe holiday season regardless of which, if any, you will be celebrating. Since mostly everything will be closed on Friday, use the day as an excuse to express the love you have for the people in your life.

After all, all you need is love.

Peace.